A few days ago I was filled with Upset and the world was Overflowing with Troubles. Then I Realized it's not the Grownups' Fault; they just Don't Know Any Better. That's why we Toddlers have to Look After Them. Without us, they'd be totally Helpless.
For Example.
Today I had to Sort the mommy's Cosmetics. None of them were Matched by Color and only Some of Them by Shape. It was a Total Mess. Fortunately my Innate Sense of Organization came to the Rescue. Then I Organized the mommy's Shoes, because they were hanging in a plastic thing on the closet Door and that makes No Sense at all, because you can't put Shoes on unless they're on the floor. Now they are in a neat pile by the Bed so the mommy can wear them when she wakes up in the Morning.
The parents must have been so so Happy after I brought Peace to the House, because they brought me my Little Music Box and Wound it Up. Which is called Bartering. I learned About it. When you do a Service of Incredible Intelligence and Sacrifice for the Grownups, they Give you Something. Like a Music Box. Or Nom Noms. Only sometimes they Don't.
Also I Opened the Music Box and Discovered the mommy had put Pretties inside. There was a Bracelet, and a Locket, and a Heart Locket, and a Rosary. The Chain on the Locket feels so so good when I draw it back and forth across my Gums, because they are Sore from Teething.
In fact I think I know why the Grownups don't Always Have Giggles. It's because they are Teething All the Time.
I think we should try a new Solution to the Grownup Problem. We should find Heart Lockets with little Chains for all the Grownups, so they can Chew on them All the Time and feel much much Better and be More Full of Giggles and Get Their Happy Back.
I really like the Pretties in the Music Box, and I think the mommy and the daddy try so so hard to have Fairness in their Hearts and to keep their Happy. In Fact I'm becoming so so Attached to them. It worries me sometimes because I might be Losing My Objectivity, and Blending In too much. Sometimes when we run around the house Playing and Giggling I feel so so Happy and Dizzy and full of Warm Things Deep Down Inside, and then when I Catch My Breath I almost feel like I'm becoming One of Them. I can't tell the Toddler Research Society that, but I am very Fond of the parents and I am beginning to Understand them Sometimes A Little. They are the way they are because their Houses are So Messy and All Their Colors are Mixed Up, and also they are So Tall and when they Fall Down they Get Hurted so so Much. It's not their Fault. They just need Toddlers with Wisdom and Discernment to Look After Them and help them Find Their Happy and Get Organized.
I don't think that's what the Toddler Research Society wants to Hear, but that doesn't make it not True.
I am going to go Chase the Kitties for a while, and Think Deep about This. The Grownups are Sometimes Full of Snuggles and today has been One of Those Times. I really Like Them. A Lot. I'm going to try to Help Them Out more.
Your wise toddler anthropologist,
Baby River
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